How to stop lying to look good? People often lie to make a good image of themselves. At some point, most of us have been in such a situation.
If I don’t accept that I’m lying, that I hide my emotions to look good, then I live in fear without realizing it!
I often observed people who were lying, it was so obvious!
But I always denied that I was lying without ever observing myself because I reacted to protect my image, my ego, my reputation, my “looking good”.
And yet, to others, it was obvious that I was lying.
Wasn’t I denying my truth by being afraid to see myself as I was and thus give more force to the lie without realizing it?
I stopped lying when I declared my truth, understood my feelings and emotions, and when I accepted that I was lying to look good and thus bring into existence in my mind, that I was the only one responsible for everything that happened to me.
It is the truth that liberates and not the efforts that I make to free myself from it!
To be Responsible is to Accept that I am Lying and to have the Courage to Declare it!
There is no big or small lie, I lie or I don’t lie!
Without the acceptance and understanding of the lie, it is impossible to change something, to overcome the lie, because I deny its existence and only what exists can be transformed, never what does not exist, never what I deny.
By accepting, therefore by declaring that I am lying, I bring into existence in my consciousness, that I am responsible and thus have the power to change what exists. In other words, I can stop lying.
If I blame, blame others or the circumstances, I keep in place the energy that creates the lie by seeking to change others or the circumstances. It only hides my responsibility as a creator, ignores it, and does nothing to change me.
In truth, wanting to look good is to hide or deny my nature, and to manage my emotions is to lie while distorting my truths!
Therefore, to stop me from lying, I had to understand my feelings and emotions. For that, I need to know that I was responsible for it, no matter if I was aware of it or not.
Understand My 5 Emotions and My 2 Feelings
It all starts in me with my 2 feelings of being, a feeling of good or a feeling of bad, and my emotions well expressed them.
Anger
Anger is a very natural emotion. It’s the expression that allows me to answer “no thank you”, to say “it’s enough abuse”, “I don’t like it”. My anger doesn’t have to be hurtful, violent, or hurt anyone.
If I had been allowed to affirm or express my anger, then in adulthood, I would have behaved in a healthy way. I would have overcome my anger very quickly.
But I was made to feel that the anger was wrong, unwise, or incorrect and that it was wrong to express it, that I shouldn’t even feel it. Once I became an adult, I tried to manage this emotion to look good.
The constantly repressed anger becomes fury, revenge, hysteria, madness, violence, or rage, which are completely unnatural emotions. Because of this, I created many conflicts and caused divisions in relationships.
Pain
Pain is a completely natural emotion. It’s the expression that allows me to say goodbye, to say goodbye, when I don’t want to. This pain pushes, exposes, or projects the sadness that I feel when I lose something or someone.
If I had been allowed to externalize, affirm or express my grief, then I would have easily got rid of it and when I became an adult, behave very adequately towards sadness and, therefore, overcome it very quickly.
But I believed it was wrong to cry, to whine. I learned through fear and guilt not to cry and thus hide my pain. Once I became an adult, I tried to manage this emotion to look good.
Continually repressed grief turns into depression, blah, grief, distress, and chronic melancholy which are completely unnatural emotions. Because of this, I created many conflicts and caused divisions in relationships.
Envy
Envy is a completely natural emotion. It’s the expression that pushes me to do an action as the other does. It is seeing my parents walking or hugging each other and thus wanting to walk, hug, or ride a bicycle. Envy is the natural emotion that allows me to do something again, to persevere in the effort, to continue to act until I get there.
If I had been allowed to exteriorize myself, affirm or express my desires, then once I became an adult, I would have had a very healthy behavior and I would have easily overcome my desires.
But I was told that it was wrong to feel envy, that it was wrong to express it, that I should not envy anyone or even feel that way. Once I became an adult, I tried to manage this emotion to look good. Hence, it didn’t stop me from lying.
Continually repressed envy becomes jealousy, rivalry, competition, revenge, an antipathy which are emotions that are not at all-natural. Because of this, I created many conflicts and caused divisions in relationships.
Fear
Fear is a very natural emotion. This is the expression that allows us to act with caution. All newborns come to this world with only two fears. That of falling and that of loud noises. All other fears are reactions to my parents’ behavior or the environment.
If I had been allowed to affirm or express my fear, my fear, then it would have allowed me to insert a little caution into my life and that of others and help me to keep my body healthy and my mind. quiet.
Everybody told me that it was wrong to feel fear, that it was wrong to feel it, and that I shouldn’t talk about it. Once I became an adult, I tried to manage this emotion to look good.
Continuously repressed or hidden fear turns into panic, terror, anxiety, worry, cowardice, vandalism, or terrorism which are not at all natural emotions. Because of this, I created many conflicts and caused divisions in relationships.
Love
Love is a very natural emotion. It is the expression that pushes me to get closer to others, to be together, to do kind and fair actions without receiving anything in return.
If I had been allowed to express my love and receive it unconditionally, without obligation and without shame, I would never have needed others or demanded anything else in return, for the joy of love expressed and received from this way, is sufficient in itself.
But people told me that it was wrong to feel the love this way, that love has conditions, limits, rules, moral codes, restrictions, manipulations, and restraints.
Endlessly repressed or hidden love becomes security, possessiveness, exclusivity, unconscious selfishness which are emotions that are not at all-natural. Because of this, I created many conflicts and caused divisions in relationships.
Tell My Truth or Stop Lying Consciously or Unconsciously
I was conditioned that it was more important to look good than to be true and therefore to lie instead of expressing my truth.
School is the place to learn something, not to understand something. Learning comes from outside while understanding comes from within. So the real teaching is not to get something into people’s minds but to make them understand that it is already in them by setting an example.
I don’t know how many times I’ve listened to these educated adults not knowing the difference between a feeling and an emotion. Between energy and energy in motion. Between being and expressing this state of being.
No wonder they only believed in the word “doing” by wanting me to control my emotions in order to look good and thus totally forget the existence of their feelings and expressions of being!
However, there is a conscious choice between being and expressing being, between a feeling and an emotion, but without the awareness of this choice, I can react with the worst solution to stop lying which is: say what I am.
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